Weird Things covert narcissists do to get an emotional control


Covert narcissists are individuals who have a high sense of self-importance and entitlement, but they disguise their true nature behind a veneer of humility and kindness. They often use subtle tactics to manipulate and control those around them. They love to have emotional control over their victims and use different tactics to do it. If you are also encountering a narcissist and facing difficulties to handle them, then keep reading as we will be discussing some weird things covert narcissists do to get emotional control.

1. Gaslighting

 Gas lighting is one of the weird things Covert narcissists do to make you doubt your own thoughts, feelings, and perceptions. They may tell you that your memory is faulty or that your emotions are exaggerated, making you question your own sanity. Psychologists believe that there are some obvious reasons why a narcissist gaslights his/her victim. Actually, they want to emotionally control their targets to make them dependent. In addition to that, their motive is to lift their ego or to make themselves feel better. Narcissists might also gaslight their targets as they are insecure or having low self-esteem.


Projection is one of the common weird things covert narcissists do to get an emotional control over their victims. Mind experts call it a kind of control and manipulation tactic. Actually, narcissists don’t allow other people be creative and independent as it challenges them. In addition, it also makes their life uneasy and inconvenient. Therefore, they try every technique to get the control back .

Actually, covert narcissists live in dream world and they often decline to accept their mistakes and failures. Therefore, they put blames on their targets and project themselves as victims. Whenever narcissists use this technique, it always means that it is just another way to control their victims.

Moreover, they might also accuse you of doing things that they themselves are doing, but in a more subtle manner.


Covert narcissists may use subtle forms of aggression, such as giving you the silent treatment, making snide comments, or using sarcasm to make you feel bad about yourself. Majority of people have most likely utilized this exploitation technique at one time or another without noticing it. However, people with covert narcissism often utilize passive-aggressive behavior to share annoyance or make themselves appear above.

Psychologists have identified two main causes of this attitude :

  • Narcissists have belief that they are special than others and they deserve the best .
  • The need to take revenge from people who have done wrong with them in the past

The most common weird things covert narcissists do related to passive aggressive behavior includes sarcastic comments enclosed in the guise of fun and disrupting someone’s work to get attention. In addition, they also  give silent treatment to make other feel bad.

4.Victim-playing to Get Emotional Control

Victim playing is included in the list of most common weird things covert narcissists do to emotionally control their victims. They may play the victim and make you feel responsible for their problems. They may exaggerate their own hardships and downplay your own, making you feel guilty for complaining or asking for help. Narcissists often play the victim card to gain something from making their target feel guilty. Furthermore, their tendency to use manipulation tactics distinguishes from normal people around us.

5.Love bombing

Love bombing is also one of the common weird things covert narcissists do to control their target individuals .They may shower their victims with compliments, affection, and gifts, but only to make you dependent on them and control their behavior. They may withdraw their love and support when they don’t get what they want. Love bombing is a clever tactic of overpowering someone with excessive admiration and charm. Just imagine someone giving flattering comments, or love notes on the mirror or  kitchen table to make you flattered .They use different romantic gifts  to attract their victims  and increase their frequency to overpower their targets through their fake love. They make surprise appearances to force you to spend extra time with them . The main aim of this is to emotionally manipulate you to do something special for them.

6.Smear campaigns

They may spread rumors and lies about you to others, making you look bad and isolating you from your support system.

The main aim of Weird things covert narcissists do during their smear campaigns is to disrepute their target by taking over the control of the relationship after it has finished. A covert narcissist will keep spreading lies or craft embellishments about their victims to damage the repute of his/her target. This is a collective conduct of people having narcissistic personality disorder after they get realization that they have lost complete control over other person.

A narcissistic insulting campaign has some other objectives such as isolating their victims so that they can’t get any support from their family or friends. Normally, this method is employees by covert narcissists but it is not much different from campaigns launched by different politicians against their rivals during election rallies. However, smear campaign launched by narcissist is mostly malicious and consistent.


Covert narcissists may involve a third party in your relationship, such as a friend or family member, to create drama and tension. They may also use the third party as a weapon against you, making you feel like you are in competition for their approval and attention. It is included in the list of weird things covert narcissists do and known as triangulation.

Narcissistic triangulation is an emotive behavioral tactic used by a narcissist to influence things in their favor. Usually, they involve a third person while communicating with their target to make things go their way. They talk with third party in a way that creates a division and other person ends up on their side. Narcissists do not get tired of wanting things to go their way; this is why they triangulate. One of the ways to identify narcissistic triangulation in a relationship is when the narcissist keeps talking about the good deeds of their ex.

Psychologists believe that the main objective of using this technique is to make their present partner feel extremely  jealous and uncomfortable .


Keep in the mind that it is extremely crucial to identify these weird things covert narcissists do and safeguard yourself from them. Therefore, it is important to set healthy boundaries, seeking aids from mental health professional can help in dealing covert narcissists.

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