A trauma of narcissistic abuse does not mean an end. Here are the set of qualities that can bring out the best in the Survivor.
What is Narcissistic Abuse?
It is the term used by mental health specialists to depict the adverse results of being involved with a narcissist. Abuse can be psychological, mental, physical, or sexual, as the narcissist will go to outrageous lengths to abstain from accepting fault or feel disgrace.
Perceiving that you encountered narcissistic abuse, regardless of whether from heartbreak, family, or relatives, is a significant initial move toward healing. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say the survivor had been through hell. However, it’s because of these bitter experiences that unleash the potent qualities of a narcissistic abuse survivor. These qualities define the future of that person.Here I will discuss these qualities that are developed in a narcissistic abuse survivor.
Resiliency after Narcissistic Abuse
Narcissistic abuse can raise the risk of mental health problems. Being resilient can aid in the prevention of depression and anxiety. Resilience is described as an adaptation when trauma, the tragedy of any adversity hits. Instilling the quality of resiliency helps us cross the turbulent waves and empowers you to make your life meaningful.
It’s important to note here that resiliency means that a survivor of narcissistic abuse will not experience distress. Think of resiliency as a workout. Just like It takes time to build muscles, building resiliency will not come overnight. To shed off years of a toxic relationship of narcissistic abuse and replace it with healthy thoughts is a slow and steady process but ensures success in future life.
The survivor of narcissistic abuse learns the skill to recover from any given difficult situation. Based on the bitter experience, a person knows to deal with complex emotions. Be it any shock, anger, loss, or any trauma, the survivor learns to bounce back to life.
Fostering Self-worth after Narcissistic Abuse
The act of cherishing yourself and ultimate happiness is self-love. It’s a willingness to embrace unwavering support and self-care. Self-love manifests itself in our desire to fulfill our requirements. Simple things that are important in our routine include cooking when we don’t want to eat, showering when we don’t have the energy to put off the comforter, etc.
You should love yourself as much as you can give love to anyone. If you are suffering from anxiety, depression, narcissistic abuse, or some other mental health problem or disease, loving yourself can get challenging, especially when you don’t feel lovable all of the time — yet it’s still essential. When you’re feeling particularly lousy, make yourself a priority.
The survivor of narcissistic abuse gradually comes in terms of the fact that they were not at fault. After years of judging oneself to be worthy of abuse, the survivor takes a sigh of relief once out of the relationship. One understands that love, respect and happiness are the right they deserve. This includes practicing self-care through sleep, going for a walk, reaching out to loved ones, pursuing a favourite hobby, and much more.
Empathy- Reaching out to others
Empathy is one of the attributes that people look for in a counselor or health care provider. It entails an open-minded, compassionate, and understanding response.
Surprisingly, empathy’s bonding capacity helps both the individual who is experiencing trouble and the individual listening and reacting. The one supported by kindness will feel rekindled spirit and light, and the gesture of effectively helping another person will feel the same way.
As the survivor of narcissistic abuse starts to open up, he/she discovers there are so many others out there who the victims of similar abuse. Therefore,the survivor thus positively channels energy to help and counsel others who are in distress. Contributing to ending the vicious circle and breaking others’ silence makes them empowered and compassionate.
Empathy gives a sense to the survivor of narcissistic abuse of belonging and that they are not alone. No one is resistant to the need for compassion from others, as it aids us in overcoming the complicated challenges of life.
Getting Independent after Narcissistic Abuse
People who suffer from abuse may feel as if they have no control over their lives. Allowing the person, you care for to make their own decisions will let them regain power. Therefore, as soon as a survivor gets out of the abuse, he/she looks for avenues for self-discovery. The sense of independence will be enough for them to regain their lost self-confidence. And then they will be back on their feet.
The survivor of narcissistic abuse instills the quality of setting the boundaries. The pride one starts to take for not depending on anyone as a means of happiness seems euphoric. The Survivor will explore the means to be financially and emotionally independent and strive in the best possible way.
Narcissistic abuse survivor yearns to set realistic goals and aim towards achieving them. The Survivor might indeed feel vulnerable because of the past. However, an optimistic outlook towards life keeps on reminding that one need not rely on others for happiness and purpose in life.
Confidence- Self-assurance to succeed
Confidence comes from the recognition that you have those sparkling skills and positive characteristics. That you can face any obstacles and cope with challenging situations, and that you are your primary asset! Your level of confidence will fluctuate over time and in various areas of your life. Multiple factors can influence your trust levels, including your emotions, feelings, behavior, and past experiences.
When you are optimistic, you are more likely to make choices that are beneficial to your well-being. Consequently, having a brighter outlook towards the life will help you make better choices to take yourself out of narcissistic abuse.
The way you’ve been received in social settings by others can either boost or deflate your self-esteem. Having the kind of negative people who make you feel like you’re not good enough can undermine your self-esteem and make you want to withdraw.
Believing in oneself is the greatest gift one can cherish. There was a time when the Survivor of narcissistic abuse felt isolated and manipulated. After considering a light at the end of the tunnel, the Survivor of narcissistic abuse puts on the scars proudly. Rather than taking away self-worth, the abuse has boosted the confidence to surpass any challenge in life.
Narcissistic abuse is not the end!
Narcissistic abuse is unfortunately recurring and damaging unless one makes up a mind to escape it. If we have the will to do better for ourselves, we can do it. Nothing will be able to stop us if we have made up our minds. It all comes down to our own inner will. And that will would have self-confidence and self-love to push it to make us act upon it.
The healing process of narcissistic abuse might prolong and brings along challenges. However, the qualities it brings out in the person are comparable to a precious diamond once a worthless rock.
Suppose you are lucky to escape the narcissistic abuse and still in a lurch. You want to move forward and bring out these qualities, but can’t? Don’t shy away from professional help or a support group. Don’t let the pain of the traumatic events haunt you for the rest of your life. Prioritize yourself. Let not your scarred past of narcissistic abuse come in the way of your beautiful future!